Laying Fallow

Emerging Trend - Micro Retirements and Burnout

As a trend forecaster and storyteller, I identify patterns. Sometimes I am subject to those trends myself. A trend is plotted on a curve and starts as an emerging phenomenon. You have the early adopters. I chuckle to myself because that has been my struggle. I remember dragging my dad around the high street looking for a shrug in the early 90's. Asking the shop assistants in Miss Selfridges and Topshop for this new silhouette I had seen on the catwalks. I was met with blank stares and puzzled expressions and finally gave up, as Northampton was not exactly a hub for fashion unless you were into high-end footwear—but that is another story for another day.

As for the trend i am going to analyze in this piece. I was also subject to it a very real case study. An early adopter of burnout. I can identify exactly when it occurred. I was absolutely 100% on fire in the corporate world, solving problems, curating beauty, and generally killing it season after season. Each delivery "was more beautiful than the last". However, at this particular corporation, there was no let-up. Those elusive downtimes that typically exist within the creative calendar were not built in—but literally, thank God for Christmas! The one sacred period between Christmas and New Year where all the leadership is scattered across the nation to be with loved ones. I could see it on the horizon; it was December 19th, and I had my final Zoom with one of the design directors. There it was: my match just fizzled out. I had nothing. I was empty, a charred stick smoldering.

So I signed off totally empty and took 10-day vacation . It didn't ignite my spark nor the following FMLA leave. I had lost it, and so I was forced to save what was left of myself and go fallow.

Laying fallow is an agricultural term for when a field is rested. The term is "fallow" - when farmers intentionally leave agricultural land unseeded and unplanted for a period of time to allow it to restore its fertility naturally. When a field is "lying fallow" or is "fallowed," it helps prevent soil depletion, reduces pest and disease problems, and can improve soil structure.

The practice of leaving land fallow is part of crop rotation systems and has been used for thousands of years in agriculture. Growing up in the countryside of Northamptonshire, this was a practice I observed. Those fields caught my eye during car trips. They would be an influencer's daydream. Long wild grasses strewn with cornflowers , vibrant red poppies and flashes of wind-scattered yellow oilseed from neighboring fields.

So I did it. I was fallow. I have recently heard it described as a micro retirements. Mine, however, started more feral. But as nature, the universe, or God typically works, my fallow period started with my essence, my internal wisdom. It was a humbling cry for help. I needed others to intervene, and that is what a faithful, spirit-filled friend group did for me. It was a late-night gathering where they prayed over me. In fact, I felt numb, absolutely nothing. Like those hard, frozen country fields, but something supernatural was unleashed. A course of events was waiting to unfold. It was like these prayers cut through my freeze response.

I am not going to tell you then ta-da, I was ablaze again, fully reignited to my former productive level. You see, the fallow period takes months or even years. There is hard work being done in the very earth. It starts small, unseen. Microbes and organisms are reinstated. Then the seeds are dropped by carefree birds, and then the germination takes place—the pushing up of something new. Eventually, the field attracts field mice, rabbits, badgers, foxes, and deer. Who then leave their, umm, what shall we call it—their goodness or contributions enriching the earth.

The once unhealthy field is now fortified and fertility is restored. Friends, if you too have reached burnout, I encourage you to go fallow. Have faith; nature knows what she is doing. All is not lost. Don't give up hope. Listen to your body. She too is part of nature and will gradually unfold what you need.

I don't wish to be prescriptive or really give a recommendation for laying fallow. It is a deeply personal journey that only you can take, but I am always happy to share. As a trend forecaster, I have acted like an oracle or, more accurately, a town crier. "Hear ye, hear ye, the shrug is the newest rendition of the sweater!"

Enough amusing myself with images of young Anne Marie perched on an apple crate, ringing my bell and shouting to the crowds in medieval Britain. I am going to have to Midjourney that!

My fallow, unseen internal work:

Here is what I did to nourish my soul. Firstly

I listened and believed my intuition. I will not gaslight myself!

I played with a new art medium with no agenda. Mine was clay, and just to clarify, I am a rubbish potter. Oh, but I met some epic people in class and did some meditative making.

I got up when everyone was sleeping to read, pray, meditate, and journal. I had to be resourceful, as creeping past my 2 and 4 year-olds' bedrooms was not the play. One squeaky floorboard and out they pop, and I instantly turn into a short-order chef. So I used what I have, which is my en suite bathroom. I dragged in a small side table, loaded it with a little lamp, my Bible, journals, colorful crystals, and most importantly, an electric kettle. Aha! I hacked the system. I now had 30-60 minutes to build my day off of.

I enlisted a therapist, career and relationship coaches, workshops, YouTube videos, personal development audiobooks, and Zoom trend meetings. All depositing small portions of nourishment to my barren field.

I moved my body how she wanted to move: walking, yoga, dance wildly to kate bush and full-on rage ran one time when the kids and my hormones were driving me bonkers.

I had consistency and rhythm with supplements and nourishment. I would like to say that was Whole Foods, clean eating blah blah blah, but nope—my inner teen wanted Jolly Ranchers and margarita pizza on more than one occasion. I owed her big time and she had suffered in silence for 30years.

I spent time with friends, the real ones—the possibility thinkers, the ones with unconditional love who are happy to just be. One day I spoke on the phone for 7 hours! Thank you AT&T for unlimited data. I also lost some “friends” the takers and the ridged ones. It was clarifying.

I embraced my faith with both hands, singing, meditation and listening. God grew bigger and brighter more loving and abundant before me.

Got in nature

Took some naps

Watched some BBC

Asked for help

Took a staycation

Was selective of which clients I worked with, and got out of my comfort zone and solo adventured in Japan.

Then it came, the rain. Tears watering all the goodness in to the earth. As a side note I hadn’t cried for 30 years. I had been bottling and saving my tears for this very season, to gently water the goodness in. Thank you hurt and grief, you bless me with goodness unimaginable.

Things I Didn't Do:

Give up on my responsibilities

Go dark or off-grid

Go to an expensive retreat where they remove your phone. That would’ve been nice and I may try that when I get my first book deal.

Bed rot, that trend was not for me.

Judged or blame others

Stay silent, I finally spoke up about hurts I had held on to for decades

Listen to fear and loud lies

Spend loads of money on crap

My result is that I found my bespoke method of self-care, and it wasn't eating clean and sheet masks. My self-care brought true joy and with it an abundant harvest of creativity. How lucky am I, how good is our God!

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Let’s start the conversation

Do you feel the call to go “fallow” or have you experienced a micro retirement?

What worked to rebuild your health and creativity?

How long did your “fallow season” take to rest the land that is your mind, body, and soul?

Did you have any unexpected fruits from your “fallow season”?